111902032233538250

Gani writes in his blog diary of a milk. man… about his dreams with farting. Color me jealous, Toronto boy.

“It’s a family recipe”

On MADtv: Stuart and his alcoholic, slatternly mom were farting in front of the semi-gay neighbor in a skit in last night’s rerun. They raised his hopes by packing as if to move, only to dash them on the rocks of gaseous reality.

111846197451178733

Today ain’t as bad as yesterday but I have a pipeline-load ready to be lit right now.

111837979308146325

There are days when I don’t seem to fart at all. And then there’s today when I seemed to fart no less than every half hour. Except, fortunately, when I was sitting and chatting with the bossman. Love that luck.

111802926357473657

Wow, did you see Hugh Jackman and Billy Crystal blow big ones together during the opening bit of the 59th annual Tony Awards telecast? CBS’ censors must have misunderstood what everyone elese heard so clearly. Very cool.

This is the way we fart

We pull down our pants, slowly, all the way. Next we put both thumbs inside the elastic band around our briefs and pull them out and down but just enough to expose the gashole. No further. We slide our feet out just a bit for balance, bend forward. BLAM! The explosion is awesome. Fear our technique!

111742395616018425

Fart Central was down this week with some, err, technical issues. The Management begs your pardon and hopes that everything has been cleared, that is, cleared up. Your BestFarts should resume regular gas deliveries.

Best Farts

Want to know a secret? George Bush farts whenever Dick Cheney walks into the Oval Office.

A tribute to Pete Seeger

Where have all the good farts gone?
Long time passinging
Where have all the good farts gone?
Long time ago
Where have all the good farts gone?
Girls have smelled them every one
When will they ever learn?
When will they ever learn?

111569708726569370

Family Guy is back and boy was last night’s episode filled with farts and fart jokes. Stewie even burst a blood vessel in his right eye from blowing so hard! This is one show that I’m glad to see raised from the dead. More fart jokes, Seth!